First, I'll say that things continue to be great. In my last post, I talked about the energy work I did that basically got rid of the awful anxiety I had for 20 months. That's right. And it has continued. I have been in situations where my anxiety would hit and I've had nothing. I've felt more calm than I have in so long. People even tell me I "look different" and that sometimes partly means my weight loss, but they always say, "There's something different in your face". Some describe it as a calmness, some as peaceful, some as just happy. It's all of the above and it feels great. Now, to my physical health...
It started back in the Spring, once my body started to release. Think about it as a crapload of trapped energy in my body, that had been so tight, it just started to loosen. My body itself started to release as well. We all know your body and brain protects you from things. My body didn't experience any physical illness during the entire year from the bombings to the anniversary. When I would normally have awful seasonal allergies, I had nothing. Literally, nothing. Usually, I'd have sinus headaches, sneezing, etc. I would be the only one of all the people I spent time around who didn't get a stomach bug that everyone was passing around. I barely got even a bit of a cold. It was strange, but it made sense when I thought about it. It was as if my body was just wound so tight, nothing could get in there. Once I started to release, I started to experience different "illnesses".
This was especially interesting to me because it had happened before. 5 years ago, my grandmother passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer's. I went into auto mode. I didn't want to deal with losing one of the absolute most important people in the world. I had taken care of her and watched that disease slowly kill her and was torn between a sense of relief and complete sadness but I pushed it all away. Then, almost a year to the date of her death, I started to feel it, realize I had to deal with it and I also started to get sick. I developed such severe acid reflux that the doctors said it was the worst case they'd ever seen. I cut out all foods that may aggravate it, gave up coffee, went on tons of meds, and was still not feeling any better. It was so bad, I was throwing up every day. I had never suffered from acid reflux before and it had come on pretty suddenly. This lasted for months until I decided to take myself off the meds that were actually making me feel crappier. I, instead, went to a friend who does holistic health and started taking natural supplements, drinking gross and thick aloe juice every day (you do what you have to) and within a few weeks, the reflux was GONE, and it never came back.
So, I wasn't surprised when I started to get sick last summer. First, I realized I had to give up gluten and dairy. I have experienced problems with them off and on throughout the last six years and I could tell by the symptoms I was having that they needed to go (lower energy, upset stomach, slight headaches). As I was cutting those out, I came down with mono. Apparently, it was already in my body according to a test, but I somehow got it again. I could barely get out of bed for over a month. I slept 16-18 hours a day for the first 2 weeks and 12-15 hours a day after that. During that time, I also was making myself continue to eat even though I had no appetite. I knew I needed to keep my strength while my body was so drained. However, I was finding that I was having the same symptoms I had before giving up gluten and dairy.
I was advised to do an elimination diet. Basically, you give up all the foods that can cause allergic reactions/sensitivities in your system (wheat, gluten, rice, starches including starchy vegetables, corn, soy, meat except turkey and fish, all dairy and dairy related foods, eggs, coffee, and alcohol). After a month, you start to introduce the foods back in one at a time to see if they bother you. I decided to wait until I felt better from the mono before starting this, so it ended up being about 5 weeks. I tried different foods and found that I felt crappy with every thing I tried. Then, even the foods I'd been eating consistently with no problem started to bother me. Over the next month, I started to feel sick from just about everything I tried to eat. My stomach would feel bloated either right after or within a few hours, sometimes many hours. I would get an awful headache and feel "foggy" and so drained, I could barely move. Other than those exact symptoms, I had nothing else, but they were rough enough to affect my daily activity. I went to a doctor who specializes in these types of issues and had a test taken that would take over a month to get results.
In the meantime, I was put on probiotics, some other supplements and told to only eat foods I found I could tolerate and not try anything else yet. So, basically, I could eat bananas, a little bit of sugar free organic peanut butter, spinach, kale and sometimes, I could tolerate white fish. Rough. I actually found I had more energy and felt better when I barely ate, which under the circumstances made sense. I had to go spend a week and Italy and couldn't really eat there (HUGE bummer). Fast forward to my results. It appears my digestive system was completely depleted of a crucial good bacteria.
Your gut and digestive system has many good and bad bacteria that are all supposed to be there. They work together. But, if you are depleted of any of the good bacteria, the bad takes over and causes you problems with digesting food. When food would enter my system, there was no good bacteria to help it. Therefore, my body would become inflamed and I would have basically an allergic reaction (the headache, bloating, foggy head, and exhaustion as well as sometimes having sinus issues or a sore throat). There are a few causes of this.
I have been on supplements for 3 months now specifically for this issue. However, it is going to take food to replenish that bacteria. It could take months and months. I still cannot eat without being sick. I've lost weight, which is both good and bad. First, by effort and then by being sick, I lost all of the stress weight I had gained plus some. But, the amount of weight i've lost in the short amount of time since this got bad in September is not necessarily healthy. I feel okay when I'm not eating, I do strength training so I maintain my strength and muscle, and otherwise, I feel pretty healthy. However, every time I try to eat, I am sick. Yesterday, I started to introduce a new diet that I'm supposed to try. So far, it is not going well as I have all of those symptoms I mentioned earlier. I feel like complete crap actually. But, I have shit to do and I can't stay in bed all day, so I'm sucking it up and continuing on whether I feel shitty or not. The diet I'm supposed to be on has homemade yogurt, organic, grass fed meats and fish and vegetables mostly. Basically, food that our bodies are made to digest easily. Our bodies, no matter how they've "adapted" over time are not made to digest complex carbs, processed foods and grains, basically anything that is grown by man. I have to stay on this diet for a week and see if my body starts to adapt and if not, I will have to try something else. Fun.
This experience has been frustrating at times. It's hard, especially during the holidays to go to parties and family gatherings and not be able to eat or feel great. I felt frustrated before because this was yet another thing that was caused by my experience that day. Now, I look at it as another stage of my healing, another way to reach my best health. Sure, it's hard. VERY Hard. Sometimes, I give in and have a drink when I go out with friends. I pay for it, but it's been the holidays and I've hated to miss out on too much. I am trying to be better about that. Funny enough, a glass of tequila or scotch doesn't make me feel as sick as food. I do feel like crap a lot of the time. I sometimes would wonder why I have to deal with this and people who eat crap every day don't have this when I was a person who ate healthy 90% of the time. But, they may not have gone through something like I did. So, now, my focus is to heal. I have reached a point where I feel amazing emotionally and mentally. Many things helped this, but mostly the energy work I have had done. I wrote about it last time if you'd like to look back. Now, I will heal physically and I will happily continue moving forward.
If you have any question about whether you have an issue with any foods, if you take antibiotics often or at high doses and long amounts of time, if you have a lot of stress in your life, don't ignore any of it. I highly recommend dealing with it all holistically and preventing this from happening to you. It's NOT fun and you don't want it, even if it does mean some weight loss (the silver lining in these last few months).
Hope this was educational at least. :)